In Season Mom

MEET FEATURED MOM JOAN

By February 21, 2017 Blog, Featured Moms

Name:  Joan

Age when you gave birth:  Less than a week from 39 years old when I gave birth to my son

State of residence:  Michigan

Current or former profession(s):  Blogger/Editor at Late Bloomer Moms

PREGNANCY 

How long were you trying to get pregnant?

About 2 years

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 35?

Progesterone, tried to eat healthy consistently and work out regularly.  I drove myself nuts with charting, temping, etc. but it was all helpful in that I learned a LOT more about the human body than I’d ever thought I would!

SUPPORT

Medical

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

They weren’t – I went to 3 different fertility specialists (one who had been my own GYN for over 10 years)

Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors?

I changed doctors because I was basically told – by all 3, including my regular GYN – that I would pretty much need “medical intervention” (i.e. IVF) in order to even get pregnant, let alone have a successful birth.  I felt like they were just trying to fill their pocketbooks.

Family and Friends

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told me about your pregnancy?

They were all thrilled – many of my friends prayed with me, so they knew this was a big blessing for us!

We had miscarried after trying for months to get pregnant, so when we got pregnant again “just” 4 months later (the week of Thanksgiving) as excited as we were, we didn’t say anything at first.  I told my mom on Christmas (at 8 weeks) only because I was already getting a bit of a belly.  My mom cried tears of joy – because I’m her baby and I was having a baby :).  And then I got knowing glances from my co-workers, but we didn’t confirm suspicions of co-workers and friends until we were in the 2nd trimester (end of January).

LABOR AND DELIVERY

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

It was LONG.  I had every intention of having a natural birth if at all possible – we even hired a doula.  But at about my 35th week my blood pressure was getting dangerously high and I had to have weekly ultrasounds, and then I wound up having to have my son about 2 weeks early.  And he was NOT ready to come out.  I labored without drugs for about 21 hours – using a medicine ball and my doula massaging my back and helping me be as comfortable as possible when you’re in labor –  and despite my best efforts, and as stubborn as I am, I finally just realized I needed a little “help.”  Then one of the residents broke my water and I knew I was on the clock then.  I wound up having a C-section.

I AM MOM!

What concerns you most about being a mom over 35 and how do you address these concerns?

Just having energy and prioritizing when I have a full-time career as well; I try to schedule everything and my weekends are for my family!

What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?

That I’m where I need to be.  For me, getting married later and being an “older” mom is perfect timing for me.  When I was younger, a friend of mine would lament about not being married or having kids yet when everyone else around us was – and I said, “All on YOUR timetable.”    I am greatly enjoying the new kind of fun my son brings into my life.

How has becoming a mom changed you?

I honestly did not know if motherhood was for me.  But it’s the best kind of love there is in this world.  My husband and I know our son is truly a blessing, especially considering our challenges to have him.   I’m definitely more patient!

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?  

Have faith.  Have faith in what your body can do.  I was told I had blocked tubes and endometriosis and low progesterone, etc.  but I refused to believe I was already “too old” to have a baby naturally.  Also, educate yourself.  If I wasn’t stubborn, I would have just stopped at “well, we can’t have a baby unless we do IVF.”  I did research on my own, modified my and my husband’s diets, and that helped a lot!  Have a doctor/birthing team who has your best interests in mind!

Any additional comments?

Be flexible – know that things may not go according to plan.  Work with your birthing team to find what works for you, but know that you may need to be open-minded.

 

 

Study Says Children Born to Older Moms Smarter

By February 14, 2017 Uncategorized

According to a study published in the International Journal of Epidemiology, children born to older moms are likely to be smarter than those born to younger mothers. Today’s older mothers tend to be well educated, are less likely to smoke, and are established in professional occupations, characteristics older moms in the past didn’t necessarily possess (Source-newsmax health.com).

 

MEET MOM FRANCESCA KOTOMSKI

By January 23, 2017 Blog, Featured Home, Featured Moms, Uncategorized

 

Name: Francesca Kotomski

Ages when gave birth: 40 and 44

State of residence:  Massachusetts

Children’s names : Lucas and Matthew

Current profession:  Fitness instructor, personal trainer, instructor at career school http://www.francescakotomski.com/

PREGNANCY

How long were you trying to get pregnant?

 I was trying 4 years.

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 40? 

Slowed down, exercise, went BPA free bottles, meds and followed my cycle carefully.

SUPPORT 

The Medical Community

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy? 

My ob was not supportive of older moms.  I could tell and with the second one, I didn’t even see him until after the first trimester.  I thought he would tell me something bad. And when he had the chance, he did!   He was absolutely wrong!  I was so glad he didn’t deliver Matthew. A female doc in his practice delivered Matthew.

Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?

I only changed doctors from the IVF people to a very healthy Catholic doctor who used natural fertility methods.  His methods are proven and it worked!  I changed to this doctor because he had a very healthy and pro-life way to deal with fertility issues.    After Matthew was born, I saw my non supportive ob/gyn once.  I switched for my gyn appointments to a regular doctor.

Family and Friends

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told me about your pregnancy? 

Family and friends were supportive; although my mother said she was scared and felt that I was very lucky to have healthy kids “at this age.”  She said that more than once.  But everyone was very happy.

LABOR AND DELIVERY

Did you take any childbirth classes? Why or why not? 

Yes, I took a class for the first baby.  Then after the first one, I realized that most of what I learned didn’t seem to apply!  Giving birth is fairly natural and the nurses coach you through.

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

The first one was induced, long and painful and I had epidural. The second was quick and painful but with no epidural because it was so quick.   What I remember most: pain and then happiness to see my baby.

I’M A MOM

fran with boys2

What concerns you most about being a mom over 35 and how do you address these concerns?  

The future is my concern, getting older,  slowly down naturally, as well as retirement as they enter college. Hopefully, I can give my children enough lively exciting experiences.

What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?

Feeling more settled in who I am, stronger in my will to do the right thing!  It’s good to know others who are in the same place.

How has becoming a mom changed you?

I appreciate the little things.  I appreciate when I get time alone and quiet time.   It’s slowed me down, but that’s good.

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?

Get into good, healthy shape.  You will need to be strong in will as you deal with others ideas of a younger mom vs older mom.  You also need to be physically able to handle the demands of an additional person who depends on you.

 Do you have any additional comments?

I like to surround myself with other moms and support groups to do play groups or library groups.  I work hard to attain a balance between professional life and time with my little guy, especially before he goes into school.  That’s a big struggle because I want more out of my professional life and I realize that time as a young child is short.  So, older moms will have that struggle as they are settled into their career.

I think it’s best for moms to be open to changing their hours or the way they do work.  I work a variety of hours and that helps with my balancing act.  Also, doing exercise at home through the home workouts saves me a lot of time. And, allows my children to participate in programs that are scheduled the same time as traditional gym classes.

InSeason Mom Cynthia would like to thank InSeason Mom Francesca for sharing her story and for being an inspiration to all of us. To learn more about Francesca’s fitness and personal training program, visit http://www.francescakotomski.com/

 

BE A FEATURED MOM OR SPONSOR HER STORY

By January 11, 2017 Featured Home, Featured Moms

 

 First time mom over 35 or over 40? Inspire others by sharing your story as a Featured Mom! Have a product or service you want to market to moms? Sponsor a Featured Mom article Email me inseasonmom@gmail.com for details.

 

Encouraging Ebook

By January 6, 2017 Getting Pregnant After 35 and 40, Popular Posts

 Trying to Conceive in Your 40s Coping Tips ebook

  • Quick read resource without all the depressing medical jargon or statistics
  • Over 30 practical spiritual, mental and physical coping tips that you can use now
  • Written by InSeason Mom Founder Cynthia, who conceived naturally and gave birth to two healthy babies at age 42 and 44
  • Many books offer suggestions on getting pregnant after 35 but this e-book provides encouragement while you waiting

Get it now at https://gumroad.com/l/hfaIs

 

 

Meet Mom Jill Jonas

By December 28, 2016 Blog, Featured Home, Featured Moms, Getting Pregnant After 35 and 40, Popular Posts, Uncategorized

Name: Jill Jonas

Age when you gave birth: 36

Child’s name and age: Dean, 9 weeks

Current or former profession(s): I have worked abroad quite a bit (Egypt, Dubai, Mexico) and international business is my career passion. Since living in New York, I work for a medical device company.

PREGNANCY

How long were you trying to get pregnant? 

We were very fortunate and got pregnant right away in the first month we tried. We decided to try for a late spring/summer birth month and voilá! I thought it would take a couple of months at least.

However, it wasn’t completely smooth sailing at the beginning. We had two doctors tell us we weren’t pregnant and that we’d had a chemical pregnancy! Although I knew something was happening, we were in limbo for about two weeks. Finally, the HGC blood test (it test your levels 48 hours apart) results came back. My levels were rising nicely. Okay, I thought to myself, so we ARE pregnant and then glorious 9 months followed.

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 35?

We did not take my age into consideration when we were trying to conceive. It was pretty simple – I knew my cycle and we had a time frame to try. What we did not do is stress.

On another note: When I thought that we had a chemical pregnancy, it opened my eyes to how much time and effort getting pregnant could really take, as well as the emotions involved. I am very grateful to have had this realization. It makes me appreciate Dean even more.

SUPPORT

Medical Community

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

My doctor is the one who joked with me about the AMA(advanced maternal age) he had to put after my name on my charts. He said, “for NYC you’re a baby”. So, that’s very supportive, I guess!

Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?

I changed doctors before we conceived. I was not happy with other OBGYN’s I had gone to previously in the city. My GP (general practitioner) recommended Dr. Andrew Scheinfeld and he only takes patients who are pregnant or trying. He is an expert at pregnancy and delivering babies – which is what I wanted and what I got!

Family and Friends

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told me about your pregnancy?

My in-laws were elated and surprised. We put t-shirts on our niece and nephew with the words “number one cousins” on the front with our due date on the back. It took them a while and a little encouragement to realize what those shirts meant. Once they realized what it meant, they were ecstatic. Nothing was ever said about my age.

Jill & Baby-3

When we surprised my mother, I learned something that day. She came to New York (I’m from St Louis and that’s where most of my family lives) to visit and to celebrate her birthday with Josh (my husband) and me.  When we decided to tell her the news,  I made her a birthday cake and wrote “#1 Grandma” on it. We walked out and presented her with the cake. She was so surprised, but then noticed what was written on top.

She thought we were making fun of her age and just calling her a grandma! It turns out she wasn’t expecting me to have children.  She thought I was just focused on career and other things. Once she realized that I was pregnant, she teared up and was so happy. Even though she wanted grandchildren very much, she did not burden me with that pressure. and I am very thankful for that. I am even more thankful that she is now a Grandmother, Grammy T!

On another note, anyone who has children later in life risks losing someone close to them before it can happen. I lost my father 3 years ago to cancer. Every day I think about how he would be as a grandfather, but it wasn’t meant to be. He never put any pressure on me to have children, either. I’m sure that if he had seen “Grandpa” on his cake, I would have learned something that day, too.

Labor and Delivery

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

Luckily I remember everything. I’m not THAT old! Since we did not know the gender, the best part was hearing, “it’s a boy” and then seeing this amazing little boy held before us, behind the clear curtain. I had a gentle C- section. Dean was breech for almost the entire pregnancy. My husband and I felt like we already knew the little guy the moment we laid eyes on him!

 I AM MOM 

What concerns you most about being a mom over 35 and how do you address these concerns?

Having a second child. I don’t think I will have time to mentally prepare for that, before it is a little too late. Another concern is one that any parent has, being around for them as long as possible.  This motivates me to stay fit and healthy.

What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?

I’m just enjoying being a mom! You cannot truly describe the feelings it brings or the experience with words. It’s the best thing I have ever had the privilege to do.

How has becoming a mom changed you?

Everything has a bit more meaning. Also, I’m much better utilizing the time that I have everyday. It’s hard to procrastinate these days!

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?

Don’t read (focus) too much into what you read about– articles like if it is the best time for you to try for a family or to add to your family. Do it your way and don’t let anyone tell you how you should feel or what you should fear.

Jill & Baby -2InSeason Mom Founder Cynthia would like to thank Jill for sharing her story!  Are you over 35 or in your 40s trying to conceive or first time mom to be? Could use emotional support from a woman who’s been through what you’re going through? Get live support from Cynthia http://inseasonmom.org/trying-to-conceive-in-your-40s-coping-tips/