In Season Mom

Jill Jonas-First Time Mom Over 35 After Wrong Diagnosis

By April 20, 2019 Blog, Featured Home, Featured Moms, Getting Pregnant After 35 and 40, Popular Posts, Uncategorized

Name: Jill Jonas

Age when you gave birth: 36

Child’s name : Dean

Current or former profession(s): I have worked abroad quite a bit (Egypt, Dubai, Mexico) and international business is my career passion. Since living in New York, I work for a medical device company.

PREGNANCY

How long were you trying to get pregnant? 

We were very fortunate and got pregnant right away in the first month we tried. We decided to try for a late spring/summer birth month and voilá! I thought it would take a couple of months at least.

However, it wasn’t completely smooth sailing at the beginning. We had two doctors tell us we weren’t pregnant and that we’d had a chemical pregnancy! Although I knew something was happening, we were in limbo for about two weeks. Finally, the HGC blood test (it test your levels 48 hours apart) results came back. My levels were rising nicely. Okay, I thought to myself, so we ARE pregnant and then glorious 9 months followed.

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 35?

We did not take my age into consideration when we were trying to conceive. It was pretty simple – I knew my cycle and we had a time frame to try. What we did not do is stress.

On another note: When I thought that we had a chemical pregnancy, it opened my eyes to how much time and effort getting pregnant could really take, as well as the emotions involved. I am very grateful to have had this realization. It makes me appreciate Dean even more.

SUPPORT

Medical Community

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

My doctor is the one who joked with me about the AMA(advanced maternal age) he had to put after my name on my charts. He said, “for NYC you’re a baby”. So, that’s very supportive, I guess!

Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?

I changed doctors before we conceived. I was not happy with other OBGYN’s I had gone to previously in the city. My GP (general practitioner) recommended Dr. Andrew Scheinfeld and he only takes patients who are pregnant or trying. He is an expert at pregnancy and delivering babies – which is what I wanted and what I got!

Family and Friends

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told me about your pregnancy?

My in-laws were elated and surprised. We put t-shirts on our niece and nephew with the words “number one cousins” on the front with our due date on the back. It took them a while and a little encouragement to realize what those shirts meant. Once they realized what it meant, they were ecstatic. Nothing was ever said about my age.

Jill & Baby-3

When we surprised my mother, I learned something that day. She came to New York (I’m from St Louis and that’s where most of my family lives) to visit and to celebrate her birthday with Josh (my husband) and me.  When we decided to tell her the news,  I made her a birthday cake and wrote “#1 Grandma” on it. We walked out and presented her with the cake. She was so surprised, but then noticed what was written on top.

She thought we were making fun of her age and just calling her a grandma! It turns out she wasn’t expecting me to have children.  She thought I was just focused on career and other things. Once she realized that I was pregnant, she teared up and was so happy. Even though she wanted grandchildren very much, she did not burden me with that pressure. and I am very thankful for that. I am even more thankful that she is now a Grandmother, Grammy T!

On another note, anyone who has children later in life risks losing someone close to them before it can happen. I lost my father 3 years ago to cancer. Every day I think about how he would be as a grandfather, but it wasn’t meant to be. He never put any pressure on me to have children, either. I’m sure that if he had seen “Grandpa” on his cake, I would have learned something that day, too.

Labor and Delivery

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

Luckily I remember everything. I’m not THAT old! Since we did not know the gender, the best part was hearing, “it’s a boy” and then seeing this amazing little boy held before us, behind the clear curtain. I had a gentle C- section. Dean was breech for almost the entire pregnancy. My husband and I felt like we already knew the little guy the moment we laid eyes on him!

 I AM MOM 

What concerns you most about being a mom over 35 and how do you address these concerns?

Having a second child. I don’t think I will have time to mentally prepare for that, before it is a little too late. Another concern is one that any parent has, being around for them as long as possible.  This motivates me to stay fit and healthy.

What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?

I’m just enjoying being a mom! You cannot truly describe the feelings it brings or the experience with words. It’s the best thing I have ever had the privilege to do.

How has becoming a mom changed you?

Everything has a bit more meaning. Also, I’m much better utilizing the time that I have everyday. It’s hard to procrastinate these days!

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?

Don’t read (focus) too much into what you read about– articles like if it is the best time for you to try for a family or to add to your family. Do it your way and don’t let anyone tell you how you should feel or what you should fear.

Jill & Baby -2

Pamper Yourself For Pregnancy After 35 or 40

By March 25, 2019 Blog, Uncategorized

How important is pampering yourself for pregnancy after 35 or 40? Pampering is essential because it can relieve stress. If you’ve been trying to conceive for a while, the entire progress can take a mental toil. Countless studies show that dealing with stress over a long period of time has a negative impact on conception.

What the Experts Say

Women who reported feeling more stressed during their ovulatory window were approximately 40-percent less likely to conceive during that month than other less stressful months, research shows-Science Daily

During stressful times, your body releases a hormone called adrenalin. This hormone tells the body that conditions are not ideal for conception.-Natural Fertility Intro.

While it is human nature to grasp onto statistics to help predict the chance of something happening for us, in many ways being too married to these numbers has an adverse effect on our psyche, stress. In turn, this stress has an adverse effect on our body. Mind stress plus body stress does not foster a good environment for conception-Kristin Beltaos, November-December 2011 InSeason Featured Mom  

Take a Pamper Yourself Day Weekly

Pick a day you choose to do an activity or a few activities that you enjoy.  Dance or listen to your favorite music. Take a walk in the park. Read or watch something funny. Make sure the activity you choose is one that you enjoy and will lower your stress level.

My Unplanned Pamper Yourself Minutes

Recently, while I was shopping with my daughters, I took time to allow Jasmine the Artist to show me how a small amount of makeup facial foundation could help me look younger and bring out my best features (see photos below).

InSeason Mom Publisher Cynthia enjoys pampering time
InSeason Mom Publisher Cynthia enjoys pampering time

I was pleased with the results and happy that I took a few unplanned minutes to pamper myself. It felt great!

InSeason Mom Publisher Cynthia with Jasmine the Artist

Natural Pregnancy for First Time Mom/Mum Over 40

By February 3, 2019 Blog, Featured Moms, First-Time Expectant Mom Over 40, Uncategorized

In this interview, first time mum/mom over 40 Natalie (pictured above with her son) of the UK shares why natural pregnancy was the only option for her and her husband.

Name: Natalie

Age you gave birth: 42

State/Country of residence: UK

Child’s name and age: Ralph – 1 years old

Current or former profession(s): Assistant Producer (Broadcast Television); currently a Stay-at-Home Mum

Social Media:
https://twitter.com/UneagerMother  

https://twitter.com/Natalie_Orchard

THE JOURNEY TO PREGNANCY

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 40?

I was on the contraceptive pill from the age of 17. I never had a break from it; I was on it continuously. I stopped taking the contraceptive pill in March 2016 and fell pregnant just over a year later in April 2017.

I have many friends who have had trouble falling pregnant or staying pregnant, and friends who have had IVF treatment. My husband and I knew from the word go that if it did not happen for us naturally, then we would not go down the IVF route. We felt it (the IVF route) was physically and mentally draining. We also didn’t want to become one of those couples who obsess about getting pregnant. We were determined to not let it take over our lives, or indeed, our sex lives as we felt it then becomes unhealthy.

After 9 months of not being on the contraceptive pill and no sign of pregnancy, I decided to book an appointment at my doctors,
something I had not done before, to at least see if I was fertile. It should be noted that my husband had a fertility test prior to me coming off the pill. We felt that if he wasn’t fertile, then there was not point in us trying. For some, this may seem very black and white, but every couple has their limitations and starting points. I suppose for us, that was ours. My husband’s sperm count was normal.

In the UK, some fertility treatment before the age of 40, is free on our National Health Service however, over the age of 40, it is not. This was pointed out to me when I visited the doctor and I explained that that was fine as I wouldn’t want to go down that route any way. So in January 2017, I engaged in a series of initial routine fertility tests and it was at the very last one, which involved an internal examination. The nurse asked me the date of my last period? I said, ” the 21st March”. She nearly fell off her chair as it was the 2nd May at this point! She suggested I go take a pregnancy test. So I did. It was positive!

SUPPORT DURING PREGNANCY

First Time Mom Over 40 Natalie with son Ralph

Medical Community

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

The doctors I saw during my pregnancy were extremely supportive. I did ask to not see a particular doctor again during a routine check-up as I found her manner somewhat condescending and a little rude. This was not a problem and I was assigned a fabulous doctor who stayed with me throughout my pregnancy and postnatal too.

In the UK, there is a schedule of midwife appointments you have to attend throughout your entire pregnancy. Every midwife I saw was absolutely brilliant, supportive, knowledgeable and offered excellent advice. Due to my age, I had additional appointments including one with a consultant to monitor me and my baby. He was supportive and always answered the questions we had. I felt that me and my baby were very cared for.

Family and Friends

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told them about your pregnancy?

It’s probably a slight understatement to say that my friends and family were shocked when I told them I was pregnant. No one knew we were even trying to conceive or that I had had a series of tests done. I never wanted the added pressure of people asking me “how things were going” on the pregnancy/baby-making front. Plus I think it is a very private matter and not one up for discussion! In addition, most people who know me thought I never wanted children, so I think that added to the total surprise when I told them I was!!

I only told my bestest friends and our parents after our 12 week scan, and then they were sworn to secrecy. We only really started telling people when I started to show around 5 months. One set of friends saw me at a wedding when I was 6 months pregnant and didn’t even notice!

LABOR AND DELIVERY EXPERIENCE

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

First Time Mom Over 40 Natalie in pool with baby Ralph

I had the most amazing pregnancy. I kept fit, went running, walked my dog and I even rode my horse up until 10 days before I gave birth! On New Year’s Eve, 2017, I had a ‘show’ at 10.30am. I made my husband come with me to the stables to muck out my horse before my waters broke or the contractions started.

Long story short, around 6pm, my contractions started kicking in and over the course of about 3 hours. l managed to go 8 centimeters dilated at home with no pain relief. When we got to the hospital and the midwife checked me, they whisked me off to a birthing room. They got the birthing pool ready, as that was my wish, to have my baby in a birthing pool.

All seemed to be going well and I was coping really well and managing the pain. However, sadly when my waters did finally break, it was in the birthing pool. The midwife noticed the water had gone a greenly color meaning that my baby had excreted inside me. So I had to get out of the pool.

Over the course of another 12 hours (I’d opted for an epidural after a couple more hours), I only managed to go another 1.5 centimeters dilated. They discovered that my baby was actually back-to-back with his chin up and not tucked in. Around 9.00am on New Year’s Day, a consultant came to speak to me and my husband about our options. It seemed very likely that I would need an emergency C-section.

I’m not going to lie, that was my worst fear, and me and my husband sobbed whilst we digested the information we were given and the risks that were involved. Ralph was born by C-section at 11.25am. I don’t remember much about it as they had to sedate me quite heavily to stitch me back up as my stomach muscles were so tight. Nevertheless, he was out safely!

I’M A MUM/MOM!

Do you have any concerns about being a mom over 40? If so, how do you address these concerns?

First Time Mom Over 40 Natalie reading to son Ralph

Honestly, no! I don’t have any concerns about being a mum over 40, as I feel I have so much to offer my son BECAUSE I am over 40.

What do you enjoy most about being a first time mom over 40?

I feel so lucky to have a gorgeous son. I realize now that children are the greatest gift of all. I feel that because I had my son later in life, I have been able to live my life to the full up until this point. And, he is the next, most remarkable chapter!

I have had 4 different careers up until I had him. I feel I would not have been able to do if I’d have had him when I was younger. I feel more financially stable, more confident, mature and feel quite happy ‘winging’ motherhood. Ralph is so much fun and we have the best time doing lots of different things: meeting other mums and babies, attending baby groups and classes, experiencing things I never knew I would. It’s great!

How has becoming a mom changed you?

I think if you asked my family and close friends how becoming a mum has changed me, they would definitely say it has had a calming effect on me. Whilst Ralph and I are always out doing something or as a family (including our pets) we’re always busy. I’m definitely not as wild or as manic as I used to be. Having children definitely makes you put things into perspective and makes you focus on the really important things in life.

Also, as I had post-natal depression, I think I really appreciate everything I have and everyone who supported me and my family unit during that dark time. And weirdly, since becoming a mum, I love my husband even more than I did before. He is so supportive and is a wonderful father to our son.

BECOMING A MUM/MOM AFTER 40 ADVICE

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 40?

If you wish to ‘live your years’ before having children, then I see no problem with having a baby over 40, as long as you are fit and healthy. And as they say, age is merely a number!

I know I would never have been up to the job if I had done it when I was younger. As an older mum, I feel more confident in the decisions I have to make as they are based on experience and wisdom.

I may have had 4 different careers but this, this is the best job ever!

Baby Ralph's celebrating 1st birthday

InSeason Mom Cynthia thanks Natalie for encouraging women across the globe by sharing her pregnancy and birth story as a first time mum/mom over 40. If you would like to share your story as a first time mom over 35 or 40, please email inseasonmom@gmail.com

Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Good News Support-Coaching

By January 31, 2019 Featured Home, Uncategorized

What is Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Good News Coaching?

“Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Coaching is the live support I wished I had when I was pregnant,” says Cynthia, former childbirth educator and founder of InSeason Mom who married at 40, conceived naturally, gave birth at 42 and 44 to healthy babies.

I don’t tell women to wait until they are 35 to become pregnant, but I do provide support. My goal is to dispel the negative opinion-based information about pregnancy after 35 and to help women have a emotional support as they work with their physicians to ensure the best health care possible!

Featured Mom Cat calls my live support “Hope Calls. Faith Walks.” I like that name”, says Cynthia. “I was blessed with the opportunity to support her through preconception, pregnancy, and birth. I do believe there is a Power greater than circumstances. There is Hope. There is God.” 

The 4-week live support includes:

-30 minutes of emotional support via telephone for 4 consecutive weeks 

-Email support for 4 consecutive weeks

-Action steps to help overcome your fears of becoming a mom after 35 or 40

-Information to dispel your misconceptions about motherhood in your 40s

-A good news story about a first time mom over 35 emailed weekly

-Live support from InSeason Mom Founder and Former Childbirth Educator Cynthia; a woman who can relate to the doubts you’re feeling

Who benefits from Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Good News Coaching?

Expectant mothers over 35 who are in their second trimester of pregnancy.  Women over 35 who are considering becoming pregnant.

How will Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Good News Coaching Help Ease My Motherhood Fears?

There’s not an expectant mom alive who hasn’t experienced some anxiety about her baby. As an expectant mom over 35, you’re hit with a double dose of anxiety. You worry about your baby’s health and you worry about the role your age will play once the baby arrives. You wonder if all the bad news about becoming a first time mom over 35 is true.

In this support program, you will learn the truth about popular misconceptions about birth and motherhood after 35 and even 40. You’ll discover tips to help combat your fears and help gain confidence.

Does the live support take the place of psychotherapy, professional counseling or medical advice?

No, the live support InSeason Mom Founder and Former Childbirth Educator Cynthia provides  is exclusively for emotional support and doesn’t take the place of psychotherapy or professional counseling.  It doesn’t constitute or is a substitution for medical advice from your physician or health care professional.

The information she provides is necessarily selective and deals with only some of the issues you may wish to consider as an expectant mom over 35 or 40.

What is the cost for Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Good News Coaching?

The cost is only $375 for the 4- week live support with Cynthia. Once you purchase the support, Cynthia will email you to arrange a time and date to start your live support. 


Let’s Talk Support-1 Hour

Not ready to commit to a 4-week live support coaching? Just want to talk to a woman who understands your fears or concerns about pregnancy after 35?  Consider Let’s Talk support from Cynthia  for one-hour. The cost is $65.


Questions about Pregnancy Over 35 Over 40 Coaching?

Email: inseasonmom@gmail.com or cynthia@inseasonmom.org

Rachel Demas Mom Over 40 After 2 Miscarriages

By August 7, 2018 Blog, Featured Home, Featured Moms

 

Name: Rachel Demas

Age when you gave birth: 44

State of residence: New York

Child’s name: Claire

Current profession: Freelance Writer/Editor

PREGNANCY

How long were you trying to get pregnant?

We tried for about a year and a half. I got pregnant fairly quickly for the first time, but had a miscarriage at 13 weeks. We followed our doctor’s advice, and took about a six month break after my miscarriage. I got pregnant a second time about two months after we started trying again, but I lost that pregnancy at five weeks. We didn’t wait following that loss, and I became pregnant with our daughter, Claire, around three months later.

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 40?

I went to a fertility specialist to make sure everything was in working order. The doctor said that I checked out fine. In fact, he practically gushed when he saw how many eggs I had on the ultrasound. He told me that he had thirty-year-old patients who would be quote “jealous” of my “egg supply”. While I was happy to hear the good news, his comment also made me really uncomfortable. I wish that he had managed to relay that information in a manner that was more matter-of-fact.

SUPPORT 

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

In general, I think the term “geriatric pregnancy” needs to go. I found that the medical community has a tendency to lead with that age-based assessment, and see you through this lens throughout your pregnancy. Specifically, though, I felt incredibly supported by the midwife, Barri Malek, who delivered our baby. The unfortunate thing was that there were four midwives in the practice, and I saw each of them during routine check-ups. I didn’t feel as supported by them, because they could be quite doom and gloom about all of the complications that can happen when you are pregnant past a certain age (none of the complications happened to my baby or me).

My husband and I were hoping that Barri would deliver our baby, because of her positive attitude. But we weren’t able to choose a specific midwife from the practice. Basically, the policy at the birthing center was that when a woman goes into labor, the midwife who is on duty that week delivers her baby.

Indeed, we hit the jackpot and went into labor when Barri was on duty. My labor went like clockwork (eight hours), but we had two complications during delivery (neither of which was likely due to my age). Claire had a shoulder dystocia, which Barri nimbly fixed with no harm to our daughter. More concerning, I had a postpartum hemorrhage, which could have been life-threatening. I lost about two liters of blood.

Barri stopped the bleeding, and I feel that I owe my life to her. Later, she told me that she attributes her expertise in postpartum hemorrhages to her time spent delivering babies in Indonesia, something I highly doubt many traditional doctors could boast.

Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?

I was originally with an obstetrician, who referred to me as a “geriatric pregnancy” at our first appointment. I wasn’t thrilled with our rapport with her, but she seemed smart, knowledgeable and experienced. We went to her until I was eight months pregnant, when we decided to look elsewhere. It was not a decision that my husband and I took lightly, but I was committed to having a natural birth if I was able with as few interventions as possible, and we came to feel that our obstetrician would not be as amenable to this idea as we had originally thought. It was hard to be so close to the end of my pregnancy without having everything in place (or a place to go. I joked that I felt like Mary looking for a place at the inn!)

But at my eight month check-up, my husband and I asked our obstetrician if we could start talking about a birth plan. At the mere mention of the words “birth plan”, she became incredibly strident.  Before we could even get into any specifics about what we had in mind, she told us that quote “she was the captain of the ship” and that “if we didn’t like that, we could leave her practice now.” The thought bubble over my head was “I thought the baby was the captain of the ship not you”. But I didn’t see the point of getting into an argument with someone who, clearly, had ideas that were different from ours, so I said ok and left.

That day, I started looking for another place to give birth. I found a birthing center, which was farther away from our house than we had wanted. But it turned out to be the best decision we have ever made, because I was able to give birth to my daughter naturally like I had wanted.

It’s funny how situations that are extremely stressful and trying can sometimes end up being the best thing that could have ever happened to you! I have ended up feeling thankful to the obstetrician for, basically, giving us the boot from her practice! Also, I attribute my willingness to leave her practice to the wisdom of age.

As I have grown older, I have learned to trust my own instincts and to push through the fear of not knowing what was going to happen. I think that, if I had been a younger version of myself, I probably would have believed that the doctor knew best and stayed with her out of fear of making a wrong decision.

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told me about your pregnancy?

Everyone was extremely thrilled.

LABOR AND DELIVERY

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

Of course, seeing my baby for the first time was the most memorable and amazing part of giving birth. Probably every woman feels that way, but it has special meaning when you become a mom after a certain age. You aren’t given much hope that you will have a baby, so you have a tremendous sense of God’s grace in this gift. Also, when you are pregnant after a certain age, you are told that there can and probably will be complications from beginning to end. Until you see your baby for the first time, you aren’t sure whether you or your baby will be a casualty of poor statistics. So when I saw Claire, it was a moment of great joy about life’s abundance and the power of surrendering to the unknown, as well as incredible relief that we had made it safely to the end.

I’M A MOM

What concerns you most about being a mom over 35 and how do you address these concerns?

I definitely have less energy than I did when I was in my 20’s or early 30’s. I think I am a more tired mom than I would have been, if I had had my daughter earlier. I have an earlier bedtime now, so that I feel rested enough to keep up with my busy, busy daughter! I also worry about how old I will be when she is in high school and beyond. Watching her grow and learn and experience life is the greatest joy I have ever had. I, greedily, want to go on seeing her life unfold for as long as I can. I know that, at some point, I will leave this earth and leave her. Odds are that it will be much earlier than I would like. But, really, no one has guarantees, so I try to live each day without dwelling on my mortality too much. Some days it’s easier than others to do so!

What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?

I have more of a sense of self now than I did when I was younger. I feel more grounded, which allows me to let my relationship with Claire be more about what’s best for her than what I want or need. Basically, I like to think of it like a tree. I am firmly planted in the ground, yet, when the wind blows, I am flexible and can bend. When I was younger, there would have been a greater chance that I would have just plain old broke! I’m by no means a “grand old oak”, but I’m trying!

Rachel-2-jpg

 How has becoming a mom changed you?

Being a mom requires an amount of sacrifice that I’ve never experienced before having Claire. Surrendering to that kind of selflessness is both challenging and rewarding. It’s not always easy, but it’s an incredible gift about what it means to be in relationship to another human being. The “I and Thou” relationship takes on a new and powerful meaning that is extremely beautiful.

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?

Oh, don’t get me started on this question! I have so much to say about how necessary it is to ignore the bad statistics and cultural messages surrounding becoming pregnant and having a baby after a certain age. We are individuals, not statistics. Every woman is entitled to her own journey around having a baby, regardless of what other people believe or what the statistics say about her age. Indeed, I have so much to say that I will refer your readers to a post that I wrote about it on my own personal blog, because I’m too tired and busy from caring for a four year old to write it all over again here! http://taoofpoop.blogspot.com/2013/09/my-geriatric-pregnancy.html

Publisher Cynthia’s note: I originally published Rachel’s encouraging story in June 2015. If you’re a mom who gave birth over 35 or 40 to your first baby, I would love to share your story as a Featured Mom. Contact me for details at inseasonmom@gmail.com

Gabriella-Healthy Surprise Pregnancy After 40

By July 22, 2018 Blog, Featured Home, Featured Moms, Uncategorized

Name: Gabriella

Age when you gave birth: 42

State of residence: Florida

Child: a daughter

Current or former profession(s): Assistant Principal turned stay at home, blogging, future homeschooling, super mom with a cape around my neck and an “S” on my chest. J

PREGNANCY

How long were you trying to get pregnant?

I actually was not trying, and was led to believe by doctors that it was not possible for me to have children.

What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 40?

I didn’t knowingly do anything. For the last several years I have been mostly eating healthy and exercising, but nothing out of the ordinary.

SUPPORT

Medical Community

How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

I was very lucky to have found a doctor who also gave birth after 40. It was a blessing to receive encouraging advice and awesome prenatal care. When I first started going to this doctor I was told that I needed to rotate through all of the doctors in the practice to familiarize myself with them in the event I gave birth and my preferred doctor was not on call.

There were two male doctors on staff, and one of them was a complete jerk. Everything from his mouth was negative. He repeatedly called my pregnancy a high-risk pregnancy when I had no health issues, and a healthy genetic background report. On one particular visit he started talking about low birth weight and high miscarriage rates in “older” moms. I cut him off and told him not to say another word to me. I also told him that he seriously needed to reconsider his profession because he clearly had issues!

Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?

I stayed with my preferred doctor, and refuse to see the other doctors in the rotation. It was a blessing that my preferred doctor was on call the day my daughter was born.

Family and Friends

What was the reaction of friends and family when you told them about your pregnancy?

Most of them were very happy for me. Regardless, I was so excited that it really didn’t matter.

LABOR AND DELIVERY

What do you remember most about the birth experience?

My daughter was a C-section baby. I remember being told to expect a lot of pressure. I was waiting for the pressure when I heard my daughter’s crying out very healthy lungs.

I’M A MOM!

What concerns you most about being a mom over 40 and how do you address these concerns?

I think I was most concerned about my energy level and being the oldest mom on the playground. To address these concerns, I started exercising again, dropped the extra weight and found a 40+ new moms group on MeetUp.com. As for the age thing, I don’t let it bother me. I have a beautiful and healthy little girl.

What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?

I don’t accept the “older” mom titles. I run around, play, wrestle, and enjoy every minute with my angel. Our favorite thing to do is to run around the beach collecting shells. We save them for art projects.

How has becoming a mom changed you?

Being a single mom has taught me to love with every inch of my heart, to smile until my face hurts, and to laugh until tears fall from my eyes!

What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35 or 40?

Do it! If you have no major reasons holding you back, go for it! Don’t ask for or except unsolicited advice or comments, and distance yourself from anyone who does not respect or support your decision. It’s also important to join a support group with other 35+ moms. You will be glad that you did!

Do you have any additional comments?

Do not be afraid to advocate for yourself. If you find that your doctor is one of many clinging on to the “It’s too risky to have a baby after 35” song and dance, find another doctor! Before you do, ask him or her how they explain the increase of 40 plus women having healthy babies. Ask the doctor if he/she has facts to support this mindset and how or why does it apply to you! Do not be scared into genetic testing or any other testing that is “highly” recommended for “older” moms. As with anything, do your research and form your own opinions. Most importantly think positively and enjoy your pregnancy, birth, and life as a new mommy!