State of residence: California
Child’s name: Melissa
Current or former profession(s): Human Resources Manager (I initially quit my job when I got married in 2011, and I got pregnant 6 weeks after marriage! )
How long were you trying to get pregnant?
Twenty-five years! I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome in my early 20s. In my mid 20s and early 30s, I sought out infertility treatments. Had one pregnancy/miscarriage and after several more years of trying I gave up. I went on with my career and built a life without children.
What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant after 40?
About a year before getting pregnant, I was on a gluten free, sugar free, and cow dairy free diet. The diet may have had something to do with it. I’m not sure. The pregnancy was a BIG surprise. No pregnancy symptoms. Since I do not ovulate often, missed menstrual cycles were a common thing. I was 4 ½ months along when I found out. I grew out of my pant and thought I had gained weight suddenly. In a three day period, I found out I was 19 weeks pregnant, heard her heartbeat, saw her picture on the sonogram, and found out she was a girl. I was stunned!
How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?
Very supportive. The third trimester, I went to the doctor’s office twice per week so they could monitor the baby and the fluids.
Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?
I did change doctors due to my insurance. I ended up with a great doctor.
Family and Friends
What was the reaction of friends and family when you told me about your pregnancy?
Everyone was stunned that I was pregnant. My family was thrilled. Melissa is the only grandchild to my parents and the only niece to my brother.
LABOR AND DELIVERY
Did you take any childbirth classes? Why or why not?
We took the Bradley method of natural child birth classes. I wanted to give Melissa the best chance of a normal birth as possible.
What do you remember most about the birth experience?
My labor and delivery was 2 and ½ hours total. Although there was slight complications with Melissa’s heart beat dropping and everything seemed rushed, I was able to have her natural.
I AM MOM
What concerns you most about being a mom over 35 and how do you address these concerns?
I don’t really have any concerns. I’m just glad I had a healthy baby. Everyone is very supportive.
What do you enjoy most about being an older mom?
Being an older mom has its advantages. I am much more patient and calmer than in my earlier years. I enjoy watching Melissa grow and learn. It’s a miracle.
How has becoming a mom changed you?
I had a hard time adjusting from a working woman to a stay at home mom. Most of my change has been to focus on Melissa and her needs, instead of my own. I think when you are a young mom your kids grow up with you. When you are older and established, you have to make some concessions and changes to accommodate the new love in your life. A welcome change at that. The saying, “old people are set in their ways” is not true not when you have a baby. You have to learn new ways and adjust.
What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?
Don’t worry about your age. Its just a number. There are lots of older women who are having children. I thought it would be harder, but every day is better than the last.
InSeason Mom Cynthia would like to thank Laurie for sharing your story! Had your first baby after 35 or 40? Share your story as a Featured Mom. Email: inseasonmom(at)gmail.com for details InSeason Mom is now offering live emotional support !