Age you gave birth:
I was 47 years old when I got pregnant and 48 years old when I gave birth to my twin girls Michaela and Mattison.
State/Country of residence:
Current or former profession:
How long were you trying to get pregnant?
We were trying for roughly four years or so.
What did you do or not do to increase your chances of getting pregnant?
I tried traditional and nontraditional fertility treatment such as acupuncture and similar physical therapies in addition to ultimately seeking treatment from a fertility clinic where I underwent IVF after other treatments did not work.
What did you do for encouragement during your pre-pregnancy(preconception) journey?
I read books such as “Baby Love: Choosing Motherhood After a Lifetime of Ambivalence” by Rebecca Walker because for quite some time, I was ambivalent about motherhood. When my husband and I got married, we were unsure we wanted children. However, over time, my husband decided that he wanted children. I, on the other hand, was unsure for some time before I changed my mind.
How supportive were your doctors before and during pregnancy?
My main ob-gyn, who also delivered my twin girls, was supportive, but she was also honest about what to expect during my pregnancy. She said that it would be very difficult to carry twins, particularly at my age. She was right as I did spend about a month in the hospital before the twins were born. But it was worth it to have my twin girls! My husband was a little spooked by her candor, but I appreciate what she said because it helped me to prepare myself.
Did you change doctors or would like to have changed doctors? Why or why not?
No, fortunately, I had the right doctors for my journey to motherhood!
Family and Friends
What was the reaction of friends and family when you told them about your pregnancy?
I wasn’t trying to be a twin mom so when the first ultrasound revealed that my husband and I were expecting twins, I nearly fell off the table in amazement. I think that reaction pretty much mirrored the reaction of my friends and family.
My parents could not stop laughing and still do! After having been ambivalent about motherhood for so long, I would be giving birth to two babies instead of one baby. God has a sense of humor!
Labor and Delivery
What do you remember about your birth experience?
By January, my blood pressure started fluctuating. By February, those blood pressure fluctuations turned into severe preeclampsia and there was concern about my platelet levels. And that led to an emergency C-section on the perfect day to have twins!!
Let me take a moment to shout out to the entire Labor & Delivery Team at Piedmont Hospital Atlanta where I gave birth to my twin girls. In fact, it was ladies night (really ladies afternoon) as not one man except for Handsome Hubby from my Ob-Gyn, to my anesthesiologist, to the nurses (and there were at least 15 or so women there as each baby was assigned a team) was in the room where my main doc, who also has my same name although spelled Jacqui, delivered the twins.
Additionally, as it was a high-risk pregnancy due to my age (48) and the fact that I was pregnant with twins, I have to thank Georgia Perinatal Consultants because their care also contributed to the healthy delivery of the M&M twins (our nickname for the girls).
My mother told me that once my twins were delivered, I would forget all that I went through in order to give birth to them. My mother is right about most things, but I didn’t forget. However, I will say this: It was worth it. My handsome hubby and I ABSOLUTELY ADORE our twin girls.
Right now, my handsome hubby and I are feeding them every three hours so we sleep when we can, which is not a lot, but we are enjoying getting to know our twins, especially since they spent three weeks in the NICU before they were released!
I’m a Mom!
Do you have any concerns about being a mom after 35 or over 40? If so, how do you address these concerns?
I do wonder what my girls will think once they realize that I’m a bit older than other moms of children their age. However, I do know that I was not ready before now. Additionally, I think my life experiences and maturity will help me to impart some tools to them that younger moms don’t have.
What do you enjoy most about being a first-time mom after 35 or over 40?
I’m enjoying the process of becoming parents with my husband, who is also a first-time parent. For so long, it was just us so we’re adjusting together. As a result, I think we give each other a lot of grace. Also, although I’m the oldest child in my family, I didn’t pay very close attention to all of the stages of development for my younger brothers. I’m just stunned to see my twins’ development and their personalities unfold every week. And then I just love the snuggles.
How has becoming a mom changed you?
I’m realizing that I was never self-sufficient although I thought I was. Now, I know I need help and that is very humbling. I’m not sure of the other changes yet, but I’m sure there have been.
What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35 or over 40?
As a writer, the first thing I do when I’m considering a big change is to seek out the stories of others who have arrived where I’m trying to go. So if you’re having fertility struggles, seek out success stories (like those on inseasonmom.org ) and determine if you can relate to what you read.
Other people’s stories convinced me that I could be a mother too, and now I am! Also, as the name of inseasonmom.org suggests, there are seasons in life and while now may not be your season for motherhood, there is an appointed time for every season.